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Post by christopher on Mar 21, 2017 3:03:39 GMT
I got a glimpse of the truth a year and a half ago and this led me to start seeking God for real. In short, I decided to baptize myself. Whether or not I had the right intentions I don't know but what I do know is from that day I was motivated to follow Christ. I was instantly delivered of a 4 year pornography addiction and I was moving towards Christ. Honestly, I had no idea how good that was because I was STUPID enough to fall into it again. I was undoubtedly free but like a dog gone back to his own vomit I went back and now I regret it. For the past year, I have been trying to move forward with Christ and I try to change but I always slide backwards again. I have tried to seek God several times and focused on stopping all sin (including the pornography) but I have always been unsuccessful. My last serious attempt ended with me reaching a wall where I realized I was In deep spiritual bondage that I honestly didn't know how to get around.
Today I think I have got an idea why I have not had success. I have suspected it before but I didn't really understand it. It has been the pornography; It has literally been shredding my soul into pieces because of all the soul ties I've made. I think it has been ruining every other area of my soul and preventing me from getting anywhere close to Jesus. I think I understand what this verse means now:
"Flee fornication. Every sin that a man doeth is without the body; but he that committeth fornication sinneth against his own body. " - 1 Corinthians 6:18 kjv
On top of that it has been allowing the Devil access to all parts of my life. I know now that before I can get close to Christ in the other areas I need to be healed in this one first. Today, I got some deliverance by the grace of God but I have a feeling it will be a hard fought battle this time. I need prayer so things can really start getting better and I can finally put this sin behind me forever.
Advice is also appreciated. Thanks and God Bless.
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Post by Larry Marquez on Mar 21, 2017 18:06:24 GMT
Have you tried fasting over this issue? Also did you already ask God to break those soul ties and apologize to him?
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Post by christopher on Mar 21, 2017 22:01:44 GMT
Funny you say that, I just fasted and prayed today. Yesterday I also did confess my sin and prayed to break the soul ties in Jesus name.
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Post by Larry Marquez on Mar 22, 2017 4:12:44 GMT
God has helped me with pornography and masturbation, but I got back into it over a year ago. So he had to help me again and currently with his help I'm free from it. I'm trying to be consist with fasting with his help and staying away from most entertainment media because a lot of it is suggestive & can open door ways. Also got rid of stuff that was suggestive like movies I used to own or posters, etc. All that stuff I owned. So I couldn't tell person I know weather family or friend "hey you shouldn't watch or have that.".
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Post by christopher on Mar 22, 2017 18:50:03 GMT
Thanks. Its actually really encouraging to know someone that went through what I'm going through. Pornography addiction is rampant with guys my age and I cant help but feel it is one of the most destructive sins. I have no plans of going back and by the grace of God I will get free and serve Christ the way he deserves to be served.
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Post by Larry Marquez on Mar 22, 2017 23:54:33 GMT
When I did mess up I usually confessed that instance to someone know after I confessed to God first. That makes it harder for the sin to get worse and made it annoying/harder to do the sin because I would confess to a person I knew.
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Post by christopher on Mar 23, 2017 11:22:02 GMT
Hopefully it wont come to that but if I do fall to it again, Ill be sure to let you know about it.
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Post by moni on Mar 23, 2017 15:37:01 GMT
"If you abide in me and I in you you will bear much fruit; apart from me you can do nothing". Praying for you brother.
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Post by christopher on Mar 23, 2017 16:41:15 GMT
God bless you
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Post by christopher on Apr 5, 2017 3:36:19 GMT
I would just like to update everyone on my situation thus far: I am still resisting this sin with the power of the holy spirit (and problably with my own power more than I should). But I can feel myself slipping and satan is grinding away at my resolve relentlessly. I just can't afford to go back. I will die there and I know it. If it were any other sin, I might be able recover quickly from falling but if I fall into this one again, I might not come back. It is more than just a regular sin: I would have to willfully spit in God's face to do it. I just have to lament for how difficlut this is. If I don't get free now, I might not ever get free and there is no getting around it. If satan gets a hold of me he might literally destroy me.
My heart feels like its bleeding. It cant go on like this. God needs to do something to me because the problem is inside. I am the problem. I am dead serious: something needs to change. Like right now. I think it something in my very nature. Its like washing a pig only to have it go rolling in the filth again. Ask Jesus, I am a fairly proud person: I didnt even really want to make this post but, I have to hold myself accountable somehow. I need the help of the body. If you will, pray that God would transform me, not progressively but RIGHT NOW because Im not sure I will make it otherwise.
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Post by James Brady on Apr 29, 2017 13:26:49 GMT
Praying for you right now Christopher. May God be with you and bless you. May Yahweh strengthen you and keep you. May Christ hold you close to Him and bless you with permanent abiding deliverance from this addiction in Jesus's Name.
He did so for me as a brand new believer 5 years ago. I remember the suffering and demonic attack and sexual dreams and nightmares and how brutally hard the enemy fought me over it.
Praise God He scared me enough to keep me from it.
"Since we have such a great cloud of witnesses..." let us conduct ourselves in a Godly manner worthy of followers of Christ. Indeed, believers have reported seeing the cloud of witnesses, the souls in Christ watching the Earth.
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Post by christopher on Aug 2, 2017 15:25:42 GMT
I was agonizing over making this post but I figured I must come clean. I fell back into this sin somewhere back in April and I had been living in sin up until a few days ago. I wanted to apologize if I misled anyone and I want to apologize specifically to somebodyelse because I made a promise to him I would tell him if I fell again. I am proud and I would rather run then admit my wrongdoing to the brethren.
I don't want to make this post to discourage anyone. Where I have fallen, I truly have none other than myself to blame. I can tell you that God turned me over to do the things that are not convenient because I rejected him. Currently, I've turned back to God, and am striving to take him more seriously now. I ask that you please continue to pray for me.
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Post by moni on Aug 2, 2017 19:58:25 GMT
Reading this makes me want to pray for all that are struggling with this sin. It saddens me that it can be such a stronghold in mans life. Im sure it affects females too but for man it seems its way more difficult. I think also all the media seems to be directed for man viewers in a sense there are rather more naked ladies than men. And the guilt shame and hatred of that sin(which is a good thing) and all the emotions you are going through i wish i could give you support somehow. Will definitely pray.
i feel so bad for brothers that have to fight all of those temptations in todays rotten world.
Media is filled with everything sexual these days. It flows to your mind even subconsciously. you really need to get to the point when you are not bothered by it. When it gives you different emotion. Disgust for the sin and genuine charity towards the person i guess.
I think you should discern the thought before it develops and after sometime ask for new attitude towards those things.
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Post by marktrusty on Aug 3, 2017 12:03:00 GMT
I too have been freed before and fell back into lust. So you aren't alone. I have noticed how the enemy plays it off as my thoughts and as i went through some of Gods grace i understood that we choose sin. I think i can honestly say that the last few days have been a battle. Even though i was set free from lust or pornograph or masterbation. The point remains if someone like me that was stuck in it for 20+ years. After being set free and falling back then finally be free now. Thoughts and attacks will still be there. Think of it like this if you are being attacked with any form of sin you are making an enemy of satan. I'll pray for you as well.
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Philippians 4:13 NKJV
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